Saturday, November 21, 2015

Oh if I Were a Spider, the Web I Would Weave . . .

Fair is a place you take a pig and you win a prize. Or maybe you don't win a prize. Maybe your pig dies before you get to the fair or maybe you get a flat tire on the way to the fair or perhaps you don't even have a pig and you just go to the fair and eat too much cotton candy and see the goat with two heads and the bearded lady and ride too many rides and throw up and and step in gum. Or worse.

I've been thinking a lot about "fair" this past month mostly because of my daughter from another mother, Maci. She can't seem to get her dang pig to the fair. If I was Maci, I think me and my pig would be wallowing in the mud and waiting for more slop which is not the breakfast, lunch or dinner of champions and is not a Maci meal either because she has willpower and has winning habits even if she and her pig are not going to the fair.

Last year was her first year running track and she was fast. Her mom, the other mother who is organized, sums it up well in her FB post from April 19th:

"Proud of my daughter Maci McCleary, Yesterday at the Taylorsville invitational she took 3rd out of 70+ girls in the 200, first in the 4x100, and 16th out of 90+ girls in the 100. She has done great despite her lack of experience and her daily injuries." 

But then she got a stress fracture in her femur that ended her track season.  How did Maci deal with this? She got up the next morning, dressed up, blinged up her crutches, put on a smile and hobbled to school.

In the couple years prior to that, Maci had back surgery, a broken arm, a broken hip, a broken hand a fractured tibia . . . twice,  a blood infection, a bruised neck and a concussion. In other words, a lot of her seasons ended.

After the fractured femur, the doctors figured that she had a weakness in one side of her body and came up with a plan to strengthen the weak side. Maci worked on this plan all summer. She spent hours doing physical therapy and practicing her basketball skills. She trained like a champion, and she ate like a champion, cutting all sugar and "slop" from her diet. She made it through tennis season injury free and had just started playing some preseason basketball when she tore her ACL and MCL.

Her basketball season ended before it even started. She is not going to make it to the fair. Life is not fair. All that hard work, all that time, all that discipline and dedication. . .why???? So not fair.

In the grand scheme of things, does this really matter? People died in terrorists attacks in Paris last week. People are murdered; people lose limbs and abilities; people lose loved ones; nations rise and fall, so why or how does this matter? That's what's been spinning around in my head along with the cobwebs.

I don't know much, but I do know this, I know that it matters. Champions are not made on the court or the track. They are not made in one defining moment--the swish of a ball, the crossing of a finish line. Champions are made from many moments, moments that crowds and newspapers and fans don't see. Moments of getting out of bed early while everyone else is sleeping, moments of practice while everyone else is with friends, moments of hobbling around on crutches with a smile even when you're dying inside. . .

I asked God one day, "Why?" He answered me with this question, "How has knowing Maci changed your life?" and I cried. I cried because I'm a woman with lots of horrormones, but also because knowing Maci makes me want to be a better person. Knowing her makes me want to do hard things, Knowing Maci makes me realize that I might not win, but trying will make me a winner.

So, if I were a spider with mad web spinning skills, I would haul my hairy spider behind over to Maci's and weave words like driven, inspirational, motivational and #OhIamsoblessedtoknowyou! over her house. I would probably use my glow in the dark silk so the whole world could see. And, if I was a spider like Maci, I would definitely add some bling.

The other mother doing Maci's hair, Tess painting her nails after the back surgery.

Maci at men's basketball game. It was a white-out. Love this girl. She doesn't do anything half way. 
Receiving the Riverton Choice Award this month. She would definitely be my choice.
(notice the ribbons and bling on the crutches :) )

I think Mother Theresa and Kent Keith sum up what I'm trying to say and how I feel about Maci. Don't do things because you want to be a champion or a winner, do things because you are a winner.

 People are often unreasonable, irrational, and self-centered.  Forgive them anyway.
            If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives.  Be kind anyway.
            If you are successful, you will win some unfaithful friends and some genuine enemies.  Succeed anyway.
           If you are honest and sincere people may deceive you.  Be honest and sincere anyway.
            What you spend years creating, others could destroy overnight.  Create anyway.
            If you find serenity and happiness, some may be jealous.  Be happy anyway.
            The good you do today, will often be forgotten.  Do good anyway.
         Give the best you have, and it will never be enough.  Give your best anyway.
         In the final analysis, it is between you and God.  It was never between you and them anyway.
-this version is credited to Mother Teresa

the Original Version:
The Paradoxical Commandments
by Dr. Kent M. Keith


  1. Thank you Jill. This means the world to me. I love you!

  2. No words to say . But I understand how it feels
    God bless