It is a Sunny Day

I practically ran a marathon today. Well for me. Actually what I did was walk one mile and it took me 23 minutes and 33 seconds. I was probably 50 yards in and wasn't sure if I could finish. But I did. One step at a time. Six months ago today I had my achilles tendon replaced and then I got a nasty thing called CRPS. Three months ago I felt like I would never walk again. Four months ago amputation sounded like a good idea. So, this was a BIG deal for me.

A couple of weeks ago Ric and I were in Santa Barbara watching our daughter, Tess, play Lacrosse for BYU. We went to a Chinese restaurant and Ric got a fortune that said something like, "A chance meeting will bring you great fortune and success." Mine said, "It is a sunny day." And it was. But what kind of a stupid fortune is that. I felt cheated. But then I thought about it and that little gem is actually packed with truth and wisdom.

When the pain in my foot was sooo bad, desperate for any kind of relief, I downloaded a meditation app on my phone. One session the guy with the cool Australian accent told me that if things were "mentally cloudy," to remember that the sun was shining above the clouds. That thought gave me a sliver of hope.

It was about that time that I started seeing a new physical therapist. He told me that I couldn't say, "my bad foot." I had to find a give it a positive label. "Left foot" didn't seem positive enough, so I finally settled on "new foot," which totally freaked my granddaughter out. New is better than old. New is stronger than old. New is shiny and perfect. New things are exciting--new shoes, new friends, new toys. New is so much better than bad or broken or stupid. . .

The foot that had once been a ball and chain, a curse, and a pain, a burden to heavy to bear, became my "pet." I coddled it. I talked nicely. When it hurt, I thought of tendons and muscles repairing. Bit by bit, my pain lessened and what seemed impossible a few months ago became possible.

My big toe, which has been known to give me some grief since my surgery, has been affectionately renamed "The Diva." She's behaving much nicer now that I've recognized she just needed a little extra attention and some bright red polish.

So, my stupid fortune became my perfect fortune. Forget the "fortune and success," I'll be all right as long as it is sunny outside.